Ponderings of The Heart
It was a surprise—a visit unlike any other she had ever received. And the news delivered was an even greater mystery. An angel had appeared to Mary to reveal God’s plan. She would have a son—not just any son, but THE son of God. That’s a lot to digest, especially for a young virgin, and she follows with an obvious question. “How can this be since I’ve never been with a man?”
This moment is rare because at other times in scripture, we see Mary as calm and quiet. She seems to accept whatever happens with a silence so loud that it was written about, “But Mary kept all these things and pondered them in her heart. – Luke 2:19”
Ponderings of The Heart… Mary and the Manger
The first time we see her take an inward reflection is right after Jesus was born. I can’t even imagine giving birth in a manger, lying on hay, surrounded by animals, and still feeling the sting of rejection with every door that closed, saying, “There’s no room in the inn.” After all the hustle and bustle, the work, strife, and pain, having unexpected visitors again would probably send me right over the edge. But not Mary.
When the Shepherds showed up to offer their good tidings and praise, and after recounting their miraculous story of being visited by angels who declared that a Savior had finally been born, we see Mary fall silent. No squeals of delight, not even a sigh of relief. Just a profound moment of introspection at their words while she held a tiny sleeping baby boy.
Ponderings of The Heart… Unchartered Water
Another time when Jesus was much older, Joseph and Mary had to make their yearly trip to Jerusalem for the Passover, and somehow along the way, they lost Jesus. Truthfully, He wasn’t lost at all; his parents were just unaware of his whereabouts. A frantic search began that lasted three days. (I can’t even begin to understand what it would be like to lose a child and search for three days to find him.)
And when Mary finally finds Jesus in the temple, teaching, she asks Him why He has done this thing to them. That they had been in anguish for three days while searching for Him. His response was shocking to say the least, “Why were you looking for me? Didn’t you know that I would be doing my Father’s work?” A jolting reminder of WHO He was… THE son of God. And again, we see Mary fall silent. There were no words—just tears of relief, perhaps anger, and a quiet understanding that He was different. This was different, uncharted water, undiscovered terrain.
Ponderings of The Heart… A New Perspective
In my own life, I’ve wondered at Mary’s silence. It’s a trait I’ve often struggled with and one I view with awe. I usually have too many words to say, and I regret many of them if they aren’t properly vetted. I used to be afraid that if I held my tongue, opinions, and thoughts, I might explode.
And so in the middle of joy, fear, failure, concern, anger, grief, happiness, and everything else in between, I would let her fly… words careening through the air, landing on whoever may be standing nearby.
But I’ve recently moved into a place of pondering. Tucking things away into my heart and then grabbing them when I’m alone to process and unpack. It’s not a place of apathy, ignorance, or a lack of interest… It’s a safer way to understand what’s happening on a deeper level. A knee-jerk reaction is reserved for the surface. A shallow experience that is both painful and usually full of regret. A fool’s lot in life. But pondering in the heart requires us to feel more deeply, connect to a place of empathy, accept what is without twisting it into what is not, and ultimately surrender to a plan we did not orchestrate or approve.
What exactly am I trying to say? In a world that celebrates quick wit, perfectly timed put-downs, proving points, and overtly stating opinions about EVERYTHING, why don’t we show up like Mary this holiday season? When faced with difficult-to-understand circumstances, instead of throwing up our hands and letting God know just how unhappy we are with His way of doing things, take a moment to ponder.
What is HE working on in me? How is HE using this to shape me into the person I’m supposed to be? When we don’t like someone’s response or even their point of view, take a breath and consider their words and feelings. Why do they feel that way? What happened in their life that created this perspective?
Because you see, a heart full of ponderings turns out to be a person with a fountain of experience to draw from in every season of life. A well of wisdom offering up water to thirsty souls that have been dried out from harsh criticism, hateful commentary, and many misunderstandings.
Mary pondered all these things… maybe we should too.
